The Tiger Lilies: Law & Order = Complete Chaos

Click the following link before you start reading this, I insist.

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Now we're ready. I'd like to give a Tiger Lily to Law & Order because it has created complete chaos in my life. Ironic and sad. Thank you Dick Wolf.

My husband has been out of town the last few days which has just intensified my Law & Order compulsion, but to be true, this affair has been going on for quite some time. While my husband finishes up his work at night, I sneak off to the bedroom to watch a few episodes. Not since Harry Potter have I been so obsessed with something meant to be entertaining. But it's my guilty pleasure. I blame the networks for their relentless supply of SVU's and Criminal Intents. Like waves crashing on the shore of my bedroom, they never stop coming. And I can't stop watching. Thank you USA.

I had big plans for this week. Matt would be out of town for three nights and I could do some laundry, go to the grocery store, read a book, get some work done at night without feeling guilty and maybe even go out to dinner with a girlfriend. But I needed a hit. After I dropped Matt off at the airport, I drove home thinking about laundry and Law & Order. They go hand-in-hand.

I would flip on USA and watch one episode. This is what is so wonderful about Law & Order. You don't have to keep up because there aren't any plot lines that extend beyond one program. It's in-and-out. One juicy plot, all unveiled and solved in one hour. Amazing. It's a show that doesn't require setting a DVR. Not to mention that they are on day and night. (Although setting the DVR is a plus, because if you have to get up to go to the bathroom, you can rewind it, not miss a minute--then fast forward through the commercials.)

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Then one episode turned into two, and two into five. Now it was late at night and Olivia, Elliot and I were settling into bed with my last load of laundry still in the dryer. I hadn't gone to the store to get my usual Sunday load of groceries, but instead settled for a dinner of cereal with some almost-expired milk. Perfect. That's what Elliot would do.

So now my three nights are up, the house is a complete mess, the laundry is still in the dryer and my Love in the Time of Cholera book has yet to be cracked. But the cases were. One right after the other. I can just see Olivia looking at me with that concerned look like she does with the victim that won't report her attacker. In Law & Order's defense, it's a harmless television program that didn't mean to hurt me... it just keeps me up at night worrying that someone is trying to break into my house.

I'm pretty sure Detective Goren would be able to diagnose my addiction pretty quickly and get me to scream out my confession of Law & Order madness in no time. There might even be a syndrome for this one.